Thursday, September 26, 2013

Why I think being "confrontational" is good.
tending to deal with situations in an aggressive way; hostile or argumentative.

Whoever decided to start using "confrontational" as the synonym for upfront and honest, should consider googling the term and then stop.

Somewhere along the line, in our culture, we've decided that it's better to feel feelings and assume things without any basis for our assumptions, instead of having a respectful conversation with whomever we are having those feelings or assumptions about. And I'm here to say, I hate that.

Somewhere along the line, we've decided it's rude and wrong to talk about things and it's better to just hold them inside or talk to other people about them.


Look, talking about things doesn't have to end in an argument. It doesn't have to be hostile or argumentative. In fact, being mature means that you can have a respectful conversation even when you don't agree.

Personally, I think talking about things solves way more problems than not.

I've always been one to be like, "Hey, did you say that about me? Why?" or "okay, something is really bothering me and I need to tell you about it". 

True, some people don't like that. But also true? the issue almost always gets resolved quickly, no one's feelings get hurt and the truth comes out.

And on the other side of the coin, I would much rather someone come to me and be like, "hey Ali, something you did really hurt my feelings", than go around talking about it to a bunch of people. I mean, maybe I'm just bad at saying what I mean and the thing came out wrong. If so, when that person comes & asks me about it, I apologize, say I didn't mean it like that & then it's over. How easy is that?

So what do you think? What do you think about all of us just saying what we mean & feel (in a polite respectful way, of course) instead of talking about it to one-hundred other people or letting the bad feelings just simmer?

I think we'd all be much, much happier.

1 comment:

K said...

First of all... super excited that your blog is no longer blocked at my work for "marijuana" haha. What?!

Second. Totally agree. I hate the he said she said. If I have a problem. I'll ask you about it.