Friday, March 22, 2013

I believe in love.

I've heard a lot of people with parents who are divorced say they don't believe in love or they don't believe in marriage because of what their parents went through. Hearing that makes me so sad. My parents divorced and had a pretty ugly marriage for most of the time I was old enough to understand, but I still believe in love one-hundred percent, no ifs, ands or buts about it.

I believe in love between one man and one woman and I believe it can be life-long.

I believe in honest relationships in which struggles are shared & overcome, together.

I believe in respectful relationships where fights are fair and both people know the relationship is more important than being right or egos.

I believe in good communication so these relationships can be possible.

I believe two people can love each other more than they love themselves.

I believe God intended for one man and one woman to be together and a life-long partner is something he wants for all his children.

I believe in love.

Because I saw what my parents went through, I think I want this kind of love even more than I would otherwise and I also think I understand what it takes to achieve that (mostly)

I fully understand there are days when one's partner has left his glass sitting next to his chair one too many days in a row or when he forgot to get the milk at the store again or when he's just grumpy, and I know those days aren't easy.  I know it's easy to complain about your spouse to other people and even your children. I know life gets busy and people get tired and making the effort to be extra awesome to your spouse isn't always something you want to do.

But what I also know? Is that not working to achieve this kind of love is way more painful than admitting to being wrong or picking up that glass for the twentieth day in a row or saying no to temptation. 

So I believe in love & I want it.

I can't wait until the day I know I've found this kind of love .... forever. And that I get to work on it every single day ... forever.


kenli said...

i have been working on a similar post the past couple of days! but i totally agree with you - as much as i wish things could have gone differently with my parents, i think we are at an advantage. we've been raised knowing that we have the ability to be strong and resilient through heartbreak and i realized that i don't NEED anyone to be happy. i also know a lot about what it takes to keep it together because i know what it takes to tear it apart.

awesome post!

jess said...

i'm a divorce kid too -- first my parents (when i was a wee baby), then my dad & my stepmom, then my mom & my stepdad. i believe in love more than anything, & i think my unique perspective allows me to see what's wrong & work on it before it ever escalates the way my parents' relationships did. love is hard, & i think the sooner a couple admits that, the sooner they can get to working on their love & trying to sustain the relationship.

the only difference is i believe in love for everyone, man & woman, woman & woman, man & man, because i think it makes the world a better place when everyone can work together to sustain love. but i think that's another post for another day (: