Saturday, January 15, 2011

It's about that time again

It's no big secret, I sometimes have small depression issues.

Not anything huge, not anything to even worry about really, but sometimes I have them. I don't even know if depression issues is the right way to describe it. Maybe it's just the blues. But then again, when I finally decide that it's time for me to talk to someone again, they tell me something like, uhhhh excuse me miss, you really shouldn't have waited this long to come here, as I sit in a pile of kleenexes sobbing my brains out about what I thought was nothing. 

Yep, thats me, the girl who walks into the therapist's office with it all pulled together & leaves with bloodshot eyes and a snot pouring out of her nose.

& I feel like it's time to head there again. 

When you're my age, nobody really wants to talk about family issues & rightly so, they don't know what to say and most of the time, they can't relate. 

Drew is one of those people. He doesn't get it. He has 2 grandparents on both sides, his family is all one piece, everyone gets together almost weekly for a football game or dinner. It's freakin' cookie cutter, man. & I'm happy for him for that, but I can't talk to him about my mostly dysfunctional family. & nobody else wants to hear it, why would they?? 

So it's time for me to make an appointment and talk to someone who has to at least pretend to care & who can hopefully tell me that I'm not a raging lunatic. Or maybe they'll tell me I am. Either way at least they'll listen. 

I feel like if I write this, I'll be more likely to actually make the appointment and not just think that I don't need it when I feel fine in 2 days but the same issues are still there, just hidden.

4 comments:

Brittany said...

My family was all kinds of dysfunctional before my dad died. Now that my step-family is out of the picture, things are easier, but the pain still lingers there.

If it helps you to talk about it, you might as well make the appointment!

Amanda said...

I heart therapy and have been going on and off for 20 years. It truly makes me a better mother and spouse!

Hugs to you for feeling crummy...but you aren't alone; a lot of us come from the opposite of "cookie cutter" families, and need to talk about things going on around us. Funny, I was just thinking it was time to call myself ;)

Blair@HeirtoBlair said...

Good for you, sweet lady. I should have talked to someone WAY before last year.

brittni said...

My family is pretty dysfunctional as well. Not necessarily my immediate family (mom, dad, sister) but my extended family DEFINITELY is. Sometimes it's hard to talk to my bf about this because he also comes from a "cookie cutter" family with Sunday dinners and the whole nine yards. But I told him it's really important that he try to understand my different situation and listen to me when I need someone to talk to .. because that's what we're supposed to do. I'd do the same for him if the situation was reversed. However, sometimes talking to someone who is completely removed from the situation really helps. Good luck! I hope you do make an appointment. I'm assuming you're in college (previous post about GPA) and usually you can have one free session at the counselor/student help center. At least .. that's how it was at my college. Why not try it for free once? Good luck!