I'm actually freakin' doin' it.

"We did it!, We did it!, We. actually. freakin'. did. it!"

name that movie ....

I'll give you a second ...

It's from one of my favorite movies ever, Now & Then. I say the line all the time. Sorry not sorry.

But aannnnyyywaaayyyyy ....

I'm doin' it.

What is it I'm doin'?

This photography business thing.

Almost two years ago, I got my first DSLR. I had taken pictures my entire life & had gotten pretty artsy with a simple digital camera but I hadn't ever had the money for a DSLR. As soon as I got it, I started taking pictures for free & then more people started asking for pictures & I realized how long it takes to take and process pictures so I started charging. I didn't charge much but just something for my time. 

And then I decided that if I was going to do this, I was going to do it well.

It kind of felt like I was learning to swim and sometimes I felt like I was drowning and sometimes I felt like I was swimming but either way, I had to just keep moving because if I didn't I would drown.

And drown is a metaphor for fail.

And failure isn't something I'm cool with.

So I kept working.

I advertised via Facebook, I worked my tail off to gain respect & for people to take me seriously and I took a class to learn.

I'm still working my tail off to gain respect and to be taken seriously and I'm taking a really, really exciting class in April. Finally I feel like I'm making it.

I'm finally as busy as I want to be and I'm making enough to justify spending on the habit (photography is really expensive, in case you're wondering)

I never intended to have a photography business or to be working on a website or doing weddings or newborns, I just intended to always do my best at whatever I was doing whether that meant free shoots or weddings. 

I'd be lying if I said I'm not proud of myself. I am. I've done this mostly on my own with just a lot of trial and error and hard work and that's something to be proud of, I think.

But this? this is just proof you too can freakin' do it. 

If you want to do something? do it. just freakin' do it. And if you feel like you're failing, trust me I've felt that before, but I refused to drown so I just kept kicking as hard as I could until I felt like I was okay again. 

I'm freakin' doin' it & you can too.